Some time in all my thinking recently I remembered and contemplated a simple truth that is nonetheless profound: there are tiny moments in each of our lives which define who we are and what we stand for. These are moments in which we make decisions that place us on certain paths throughout life. These are also moments in which others observe us and decide who they think we are.
I had a conversation with my daughter Mindy recently that I think was another defining moment for each of us (it wasn't new, but was none the less a reinforcing moment). I was looking at a couple of photos of myself for the first time (in which a friend suggested particular poses), and told Mindy I could never show them to anyone because I felt they made me look like I was out on the prowl to entice a man to want to come and lay with me (something I would NEVER do!). I asked Mindy if it was just me, or if it looked that way to her, too. She agreed that they did look sensual, and added that if she were me she would delete them because if anyone saw the photos it would give them a whole new perception of me.
She then added her opinion that the way we portray ourselves is usually the way we want others to see us. I agreed with Mindy, and happily pushed the delete button for both photos. :D
I know this is a simple and small example, but I am quite happy with my daughter for her insight and determination to portray herself as wholesome and appropriate. And I am happy with myself for doing the same. This was another moment in which we both again defined ourselves as women of virtue… and we like it! :D
I share this experience - not to brag - but because I think experiences like these need to be shared and made more popular... because hearing stories like these from others when I was a youth helped me to strive to do the unpopular thing... (I have always strove to dress and act modestly, and not make it difficult for men to keep their minds pure). This has blessed my life immensely, as I'm sure it blessed my male friends as well..
It is my hope... to let others (who make similar choices) know that they are not alone... and they are cool! :D
It is also my hope to encourage women to have the courage and selflessness to think of how they affect men, and do their part to make it easier on the men.... just as they may hope other women will one day do for their sons - and their husband. :)
May you enjoy defining yourself...
Corine :D
PS. Defining moments in our lives - For me, these moments come when I set aside the expectations of the world... and hold fast to pleasing and meeting the expectations of God.
They come when I please God, not the world.
I had a conversation with my daughter Mindy recently that I think was another defining moment for each of us (it wasn't new, but was none the less a reinforcing moment). I was looking at a couple of photos of myself for the first time (in which a friend suggested particular poses), and told Mindy I could never show them to anyone because I felt they made me look like I was out on the prowl to entice a man to want to come and lay with me (something I would NEVER do!). I asked Mindy if it was just me, or if it looked that way to her, too. She agreed that they did look sensual, and added that if she were me she would delete them because if anyone saw the photos it would give them a whole new perception of me.
She then added her opinion that the way we portray ourselves is usually the way we want others to see us. I agreed with Mindy, and happily pushed the delete button for both photos. :D
I know this is a simple and small example, but I am quite happy with my daughter for her insight and determination to portray herself as wholesome and appropriate. And I am happy with myself for doing the same. This was another moment in which we both again defined ourselves as women of virtue… and we like it! :D
I share this experience - not to brag - but because I think experiences like these need to be shared and made more popular... because hearing stories like these from others when I was a youth helped me to strive to do the unpopular thing... (I have always strove to dress and act modestly, and not make it difficult for men to keep their minds pure). This has blessed my life immensely, as I'm sure it blessed my male friends as well..
It is my hope... to let others (who make similar choices) know that they are not alone... and they are cool! :D
It is also my hope to encourage women to have the courage and selflessness to think of how they affect men, and do their part to make it easier on the men.... just as they may hope other women will one day do for their sons - and their husband. :)
May you enjoy defining yourself...
Corine :D
PS. Defining moments in our lives - For me, these moments come when I set aside the expectations of the world... and hold fast to pleasing and meeting the expectations of God.
They come when I please God, not the world.
Thanks so much for visiting me "at the Well" and for your comment!...you are so right!
ReplyDeleteI loved your port pictures! Looks amazingly beautiful!
You know that just made us totally want to see those pics, right? Good for you for sticking by your true self!
ReplyDeleteGood job for making a good choice...
ReplyDeleteGrace - You are so welcome... and thank you!
ReplyDeleteKelly - LOL; well, let me assure you... I was HOT! ;D But you're right - it wasn't me. In fact, they were poses someone else told me to make; I felt silly doing it, and once I saw them I knew why! I think I'll stick with telling myself how to "pose" from now on.
Jason - Thanks. It was really tough... just about the toughest decision I ever had to make; I was just DYING to encourage all the hot men out there drool over me! ~ LOL! ~ JUST KIDDING! Though I know you already know me well... thanks. Good job to you, too, for making a good choice and coming on over to visit me. :)
Hi Corine,
ReplyDeleteThank you for the lovely comments on my blog. I am so glad that what I am writing resonates with you. I absolutely love how writing and blogging brings like minded people together.
Your blog is awesome too. I love the way you draw lessons and learning from the experiences of your life. I look forward to reading more of your writing in the future
Connie
Connie - I'm totally thrilled to see you here and to know that you will be coming back more. Thank you... for your lovely comment. I look forward to seeing you again!
ReplyDeleteCorine :D
Teachinfourth - I just had to come back to tell you thanks for your comment. It is an AWESOME thing to see a MAN support such decisions; WOMEN NEED TO SEE THIS! ~ SO THANK YOU! Good job on commenting!!! :D
ReplyDeleteI was touched by this post because of the wisdom of your daughter. I can't tell you how many times my kids say something that completely stops me in my tracks.
ReplyDeleteDefining moments? They give me a lot of them.
I agree completely! What a great message.
ReplyDeleteLove, Makay
-www.sofarsogreat1.blogspot.com-
Kim - She amazes me with her wisdom and maturity constantly. Children born these days are AMAZING!
ReplyDeleteThank you for stopping by! :D
Makay - I'm so glad you appreciate this message. Thank you. Come on back anytime... :D
ReplyDeleteI love your daughter's comment about how we portray our selves - which actively manipulates people's opinions. Even near 40 I am trying to relax and just be. Now you have the memory and post to hold on to, you wont need the photograph to remember when. :) I keep some scrap pages to keep it real and remember how far I've grown, and to show the kids where selfish living gets a person. Sounds like you've already shared that with yours. :)
ReplyDeletePebblekeeper - Hi! :D Thanks for stopping by and commenting. :) I love my daughter's comment, too. i'm SO proud of her. We are both strengths to each other.
ReplyDeleteI like what you said about selfishness. Selfishness really is the cause of so many heartaches. Good for you for moving past that!
Corine :D