Discipline = FUN! ;)

As some of my readers already know... I have had disciplining on the brain lately. And after getting a few good ideas and looking at disciplining with a the new lenses of adventure... things are going well. :) I'm finding that I really enjoy this adventure of disciplining more than ever before. And I even have a couple of enjoyable experiences to share. So, here are a couple of choice tid bits from a conversations I had with my boys concerning rules and consequences. These were just too enjoyable not to share. :)  (he he - I'm really not as evil as I seem.)

This morning while I was cooking "brunch" (spring break, sleep in, relax some! :) I informed Dragon Heart that he had more than been on the X-Box long enough today, and that since I had told him to get off earlier - and he stayed on regardless, he is grounded from X-Box Monday as a result of going way over the time limit today (I really am way too easy on these kids - perhaps I should ground him longer).

Dragon Heart wasn't very happy about it - at all. In fact, he immediately got uptight about the fact that he was grounded, and Black Arrow wasn't (the twin umbilical cord which exists to be sure that twins share everything - both the good and the bad - still hasn't been completely severed between these two).

Dragon Heart's temperature rose, as did his voice. "Why am I the only one grounded? Black Arrow was on all day yesterday, and he wasn't grounded!"

I had been out of the house for most of the day yesterday, so being unaware of Black Arrow's activity hadn't yet given it any thought. I knew though, that Dragon Heart was simply trying to get Black Arrow in trouble... right along with him; that needed to stop. I needed to think - and think quick.

"Dragon Heart, you are grounded, not for going over the time allotted, but for disobeying me when I told you to turn it off and get to your chores."

Dragon Heart was still angry, and let me know just how unfair it was that Black Arrow wasn't grounded too, pointing out that I shouldn't have to have needed to tell Black Arrow to get off yesterday for him to get off, because everyone knows they have time limits.

I responded to Dragon Heart accordingly; "Good point, Dragon Heart. We do have rules about how long each of you are allowed to spend on gaming, and you are all old enough to monitor yourselves; as you pointed out, I shouldn't have to tell any of you to get off, at all, ever. So..."

I turned to Black Arrow now, "Black Arrow, you should be monitoring your time on X-box and getting off when you know you should. Since you did not do this yesterday, you are grounded for one day from playing X-Box. Perhaps one day grounded for every hour over the limit would be adequate."

I then turned back to Dragon Heart, who seemed pleased. "Dragon Heart, you also need to monitor your time, and since you were guilty of not doing this a couple of days ago, you are still grounded on Monday for disobedience, but you are also grounded on Tuesday for not monitoring your time and getting off on your own that day."

Not another word was said... until a few minutes later when Dragon Heart quietly asked, "Mom, how about if Black Arrow isn't grounded at all, and I'm only grounded on Monday?"

"Sorry Dragon Heart" I responded, "you were right; you need to monitor yourself."

The conversation was over - and I secretly applauded myself.


Disciplining can be fun after all!  :D  -  Keep reading; this next story is the fun one...


Another conversation worth mentioning also occurred today. I finally decided I needed to implement the great ideas that my fellow bloggers had given to me concerning consequences for name calling and criticism (a prevalent problem around here lately). The whole family wasn't there, it wasn't a "meeting," but more of a casual warning/heads up to the two who needed it most. I sat here at the computer typing, one son was laying on the couch, and another on the living room chair - all relaxed and feeling rather happy. I told them that we were going to establish a new family rule with consequences to breaking that rule attached to it. I explained it as follows:


RULE:

NO name calling, criticism, or the like - 3 strikes (unsure of # right now) and you get a consequence... I think the consequence will be telling the other person 10 things you like about them. If you get to 6 strikes (or less, still deciding upon #), you get to tell them 10 things you like about them, and do their chores for the day.

I was a just a little bit surprised by their responses.

Dragon Heart called out loudly for all to hear while laughing...- "No one get kitchen person mad at you!"

Black Arrow also responded with laughter and excitement... - "YES! I AM going to TRY to get people mad at me, so they have to do my chores!"

( lots of giggling going on between the boys as they consider the possibilities...)

Dragon Heart continued... "I'm totally going to get people mad at me while I'm in charge of cleaning the kitchen!"

I'll admit - I had to join them in the laughter. But I know, that they know from past experience, that if they do actually push someone else's buttons, that will count as several strikes and go to immediate consequences.

Meanwhile, I'll just enjoy knowing that though they may not always do as I want them to... at least they each have brains and a sense of humor!  ;)

TTFN! ;) Corine