Thursday, October 4, 2012

Seeing My Life Through Heaven's Eyes...

I walk outside through the sliding glass doors of my bedroom and out into my own back yard. There is a gentle breeze. I breathe it in and just stand there - looking – taking the view in without a care or thinking of anything that needs to be done… “This is our yard.” I think… It is not a rental. It’s ours. (It has been 11 years, and still I am in awe of it.)

My feet walk slowly along the ground, and I see GREEN grass, where it was recently yellow and dead. I continue on towards the back fence and walk along the garden. I look at the one word sign I posted in the garden at the end of summer: “Live.” It survived, even after weeks with little water.  It’s as if the garden read and obeyed my sign. :) I am amazed that even after all that the garden has been through this year  – it still lives and produces

Even still… this garden will see better years, but I don’t think of that. I am smiling in awe reminiscing the accomplishment that made it possible; that I DID the huge and awesome work of hauling dirt and stacking those concrete blocks to create those 3 garden beds (that makes it sound so easy, but it really was HARD work. :o Work that I am just so happy to have done and to be benefiting from still!). I remember a time when there was no garden here. I am so thankful for all that I have. 

Just past the last garden bed I see the apple trees I planted. One is covered in apples. This is the first year this tiny new tree has produced so much. I am new at this, and did not yet make a pesticide free spray to keep the bugs off like I planned to. Most of the apples are covered in worm holes. But I don’t think of that. I think of cutting out the bugs and slicing apples to dehydrate into chips for snacking on. Perhaps I will make some apple pie filling and freeze it for the holidays. I am so happy to have apples. Next year we will have TONS of apples, and they will be protected from bugs! :)

I look around my yard and see how different it looks now as compared to 3 years ago. It isn't perfect yet. It has weeds, and parts of the fence still need work. But I don’t see that. I see a yard that has so much more potential and promise than it did in years past, and a yard that will continue to grow and produce for years to come. It reminds me of my life and fills me with hope; I am startled to find myself enjoying today so much that it surprises and delights me . :D 

I am filled with joy as I continue looking… I see fruits, vegetables, berries (these bushes are only starts right now - but I look into the future and see that I will one day be making pies and canning from them)… And I see a large trampoline where the boys play. The Lord helped me with all of this. He inspired me and gave these blessings. He is good. I like my yard. And I KNOW the lord loves me! :)

I think of my dear friends and the love they have for me (nothing makes life sweeter than friends!)...

The conversation I had over the phone with Teresa on my way out the door rings through my ears,  
“I love you SO MUCH!” 
She keeps saying it to me over the course of our conversation – earnestly, and repeatedly
 “And I love seeing you and your husband take walks together hand in hand. I want a man who treats me like that!”
I smile thankfully.

And I remember seeing another friend earlier today and hearing her tell me how much she misses having my  husband, Miles, for a Home Teacher. I think of what a GOOD man he is and of how much he loves me; and I breathe out another slow sigh of gratitude for my best friend… :)

Only about an hour before my walk, my dear friend Jolynne talked to me on the phone, “I love you SO MUCH! I am so happy that you are happy again! :D” Valerie and other friends tell me they love me when I talk to too. What sweet friends I have! I AM SO BLESSED! (And what a sudden outpouring of love!)

And then there are the unexpected flowers and other friends who DO simple things to show me that they love me. Like encouraging me with my fitness goals or stopping to say some simple thing to me after church on Sunday. I know my ward family don’t know it, but these tiny little moments mean so much to me…

My heart is overflowing with love and gratitude for my relationship with Heavenly Father and the simple daily blessings He so freely gives me, as well as for the friends in my life whose hearts are so overflowing with love for me… :) I feel incredibly blessed.

I'm SO thankful for my eyes.  I can see clearly now. It is as if they have been given new life. Suddenly, I seem to SEE MY LIFE - through heaven's eyes…

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