Sunday, August 23, 2015

Mom's Special Keepsake Binder! :D ~ Tributes to Mom! - And Learning HOW to Teach :)

I am SO EXCITED about life! :) I'm really not certain WHAT I will do with it, but life is changing here, DRASTICALLY (soon, I can feel it coming!) and Miles and I feel sort of inspired to just START OVER and DREAM again, and change things up a bit! :) We decided to pretend we are newly wed's and plan out the second half of our life together! ;D

FIRST, though, I HAVE to write more about my mom! :D And, I should probably do something with her belongings and get the room emptied out for my kids to use again. :/ Yeah... I'll be glad when THAT is done! :/

Anyhow, I ALMOST started, this evening. I took a few things out of her room, then came across her big huge fat binder of Keepsakes... Letters her kids and grand kids wrote to her (including me and my kids). Photos. Cards. Pictures kids drew. Some journal entries mom wrote about things dear to her heart and letters to her kids... Mom's TREASURES! :D She LOVED this book that she made!



Of course, I was immediately distracted. :D I opened it, and saw something that I wrote ABOUT HER a few years ago. Then another, And another... Letters, too. :) It was great! There are writings in this book written by other family members as well (of course). But I was surprised to see what I had done and completely forgotten about.

One year on Mothers Day (in 2011) I wrote a tribute to my mom HERE ON THIS BLOG! You can read it from the following link... Tribute To My Mother

I also found poems that I wrote about my mom. I think I'll share them here this week (after I take time to scan them or copy them onto the computer). For today, I hope you will check out the link and read the tribute I wrote about my mother 4 years ago. But first, I'd like to share with you what I learned from reading them...

***It's funny how we can acknowledge things, like picking up pieces of a puzzle, examine them, and hold them up for others to see, without even putting the pieces together and seeing the whole picture ourselves. 

I did this. I picked up pieces of my mom's life, and held them up for others to see, four years ago in this writing...  Tribute To My Mother   Today as I read my own writing, I saw another picture/message. A New, unwritten lesson emerged from the pages... 

I grew up and wanted to teach my kids to do what I learned to do. Some of what I wanted my kids to learn they grabbed onto. Others lessons I somehow failed to convey. 

You know what I realized? I didn't DO what mom TAUGHT me to do. I realized that when I was a girl I DID WHAT MY MOM DID. I did what she did, with me, and even by herself. She taught me by example. 

And my kids were not so different. I realized today that the lessons I failed to convey, were the ones my kids didn't SEE me living (though sometimes I lived a principle in a way they didn't see it)... 

I led a different life than my mom led. I went to school part time. I worked part time. I was busier than mom was, more thinned out and had less time. Some of what I did as a girl, I didn't make time to continue. Other things, I began after leaving home, being influenced by my husband. :) 

Perhaps due to limited time (or maybe that is just how I am) but... I wasn't an expert at any of it. What I did while raising my kids I may not have even been proficient at, but they saw me do it, and what they saw me do, THEY began to get proficient at... :)

I love photography. Never got very good at it, but my twins did! :) They learned to LOVE taking photos, though, by watching me. And their love drove them to take photos, and get really good at it. :D

I love to sew. I didn't have a lot of time to sew a ton while raising kids, as I did when I was at home with mom, but I loved it. When Mindy was little, I always made Halloween costumes for her. I was too busy to sew her everyday clothes, but I always made costumes for her. Guess what Mindy learned to love to do? :D Mindy saw that I loved to make costumes (she saw what I DID), and she learned to love it too! She became an amazing costume designer! She also cooked with me. It was a bonding time that we shared. And guess what, Mindy loves to cook! :D Her dishes are occasionally, terrible! ;0 BUT she LOVES to cook! :D And more often than not, her food is AMAZING! I'm not kidding, that girl can cook very well! :D

For years I wanted to do triathlons. I began biking with my husband years ago. But to do triathlons I needed to run and swim as well. So, just a few short years ago I started running then swimming as well. The swimming I did between 5-6 AM while the kids were sleeping one summer. The biking I did twice a week. The running I did the most. Perhaps three times per week, year after year.  And when I came home from running I always told them with excitement how many miles I ran and how GREAT it felt! :D 

My kids were half grown by the time I started. Interestingly, though, ALL FOUR of my kids NOW RUN! My daughter was first. She watched me go to school to become a Nutritionist. I didn't get to finish my schooling yet, but I DID get to show my kids to see that I LOVE to watch what I eat and to try to be healthy. Mindy changed her diet, began exercising, and TRANSFORMED her life - the pieces began coming together for her at the age of 18. Because she knew I knew about health, she began talking to me about it and asking questions. :) 

Several years went by before the sons caught the bug. But Devry eventually caught it, too, shortly before leaving home last summer. When we got together we talked about health and nutrition! :D Devry also talked to his brothers about being healthy over the phone, then moved back this summer and got them eating healthier and exercising as well. Both Levi and Dausen are very new runners now. But they run! :D Dausen also lifts weights regularly. Levi just told Devry today that he wants help with a weight lifting program (his first). I'm excited to see the day when they actually come to LOVE it, too. Then they too, will inspire others! It will most likely happen; they are on the path already! :)

I stopped playing the piano when I was 16. Boys and dating got in the way. :o Fortunately, having my mother live with me reminded me to play again. I now play, even if just a few minutes a day. I just started playing again a couple weeks ago. By the way, Levi wants me to teach him now. :)

What have I learned from reading again about my own mother? 

I used to think that a BIG part of teaching was doing. 

Today, I came to realize that example IS THE TEACHER. 

I wish I had realized this years ago! I now believe that BEING a good mom who TEACHES requires taking time to DO the things I want my kids to do - and making sure they can see me do it...

Mentoring isn't about saying "do what I say, not what I do." Mentoring is about SHOWING THE WAY THROUGH DOING. And being there to answer questions and be the cheer leader that they need when they start DOING! :) They aren't going to ask someone who NEVER RUNS questions about running, or ask someone who never plays the piano questions about playing the piano. DO things, and your kids will start asking you questions and following your lead! :) It's quite simple!

PERSONAL APPLICATION: So... the kids (young adults - once a mom always a mom!) that I have a tough time convincing to read the scriptures daily...  I decided to stop reading in the privacy of my bedroom, and start doing it IN THE FRONT ROOM, where they can SEE me reading and taking notes. This means I need to change the location and time of day to make myself an example.  

I realize this is no guarantee; people have their free agency! But example TRULY IS the ONLY way to teach/reach! So if I desire to teach, I need to let the prospective students SEE me DO. :) 

I can be a teacher by showing the way. 

It is their choice if they want to be the students or not. 

But they will never be inspired to BE the student... to learn, to do, or be, something that they don't see others LEARNING, BEING or DOING... 

Well, enough rambling.

I am excited to share with you a poem I wrote in 2006 about my mother, titled My Mentor, My Mom. I will share that with you here on this blog in the next day or two (or week). :P

I also wrote another poem in honor of my mother in 2003, titled All That I Am I Owe to You Dear - which I will also share with you soon.

I have said more than enough for today.
See you again soon! :)
Corine :D

1 comment:

  1. Hi, it's me! :) I'm the author, writing a note to myself and my readers. ;O When I wrote this I had a couple of "new runners." Since then, I (the example runner) didn't keep up the example. They stopped, too. New actions that aren't yet habit or second nature take diligence to keep up. Enduring examples help. :/

    Ah well... we can always start again! :D

    ReplyDelete

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